I Hate Fake People
26 April 2010
Seriously, I have no time left for fake people. I have no time left for posers. And yet, I'm sitting here writing about these asshats like they matter. Clearly they matter to me on some level. It's just so frustrating. I have to be there, on top of my game, when I'm on shift, when I'm with my kids, when I'm asleep for crying out loud. I don't have time to be a fricken' poser, or to beat around the bush. I have time to hit the nail on the head, get straight to the point, dig deep and get this done. When I find time to bop around online, or kick it with my friends, I cherish that time and make the most of it. Even when I'm shaking things down and letting go of my professional self, I still keep it real--stay true to who I am. Isn't everyone too busy to be bothering to be fake and stupid? Apparently not. Why can't people EVER just cut to the skinny and be honest?
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
EP STORY Miss Billing In The Trailers
I Love Movies
21 April 2010
When I think of miss-billing, My Blue Heaven comes to mind. If you don't know what "miss-billing" is, it is when the trailer shows clips that make the movie seem like it's one genre, when it really isn't at all. In the case of My Blue Heaven, it was originally billed as this great comedy, and yet, all the really funny parts were IN the trailer. This happens a lot and it really frustrates me.
The most recent incidence of this is Kickass. It is billed as an action/comedy. It is not. Do not take your kids to see this movie. It is actually really dark and has some really seedy aspects to it. While the movie itself isn't bad, it certainly is NOT comedic, though there are a few funny parts. I just never want to explain to my younger kids why the ten year old girl with purple hair is getting beat nearly to death by the fully grown man.
You just end up having to see the movies, and take your chances from time to time. This goes along with the critics as well. Many movies that I love were panned by critics. Usually, their commentary includes words like "sophomoric" and "trite." But, I like silliness and potty humor is always funny, not matter who you are.
21 April 2010
When I think of miss-billing, My Blue Heaven comes to mind. If you don't know what "miss-billing" is, it is when the trailer shows clips that make the movie seem like it's one genre, when it really isn't at all. In the case of My Blue Heaven, it was originally billed as this great comedy, and yet, all the really funny parts were IN the trailer. This happens a lot and it really frustrates me.
The most recent incidence of this is Kickass. It is billed as an action/comedy. It is not. Do not take your kids to see this movie. It is actually really dark and has some really seedy aspects to it. While the movie itself isn't bad, it certainly is NOT comedic, though there are a few funny parts. I just never want to explain to my younger kids why the ten year old girl with purple hair is getting beat nearly to death by the fully grown man.
You just end up having to see the movies, and take your chances from time to time. This goes along with the critics as well. Many movies that I love were panned by critics. Usually, their commentary includes words like "sophomoric" and "trite." But, I like silliness and potty humor is always funny, not matter who you are.
EP STORY Not All Movies Are Good
I Love Movies
28 March 2010
Not all movies are good;
...but sometimes, there's enough worthwhile parts to make a bad movie worth seeing.
I've seen some really SH!TTY movies in my day. But usually, even in a truly terrible movie, there is some redeeming quality that makes the whole suckfest palatable. Honestly, there have been a few that were so terrible, that nothing could redeem them (reminiscing I can recall Angel Eyes and Dungeons and Dragons). There are also those silent surprises, the ones where I had no idea the movie existed, but found myself at the theatre at odd times with few choices, and happened to see a fantastic movie I would not have seen otherwise. On that list (and deserving of reference OUTSIDE parenthesis) are: Spirited Away, Love Actually (uber-chick flick, but still great) and Eternal Sunshine (has a much longer title, but I can't remember the whole thing -- Jim Carrey).
I will admit, that I read the Twilight series and fell in love. In my defense, I am NOT one of those rabid Twi-Moms. What happened was this, I had just had a baby via c-section, it was pretty traumatic (surgery sucks) and the day I arrived home from the hospital, I found myself alone with a newborn, a toddler and a six-inch smiley-face incision. None of the people I had arranged to help were able to help which left me totally fucked and completely alone. I got pretty depressed, with Post-Partum Depression. I was told to "suck it up, because the family needs you right now." This baby was number 8, and so I had a lot on my plate, yet couldn't really move without mind-searing pain and I couldn't take the pain meds because I had to be alert enough to take care of the babies. A friend loaned me the series, and I sat on my shrinking ass, nursed my baby, and read, read, read. Diving into a good series, a simple series that was easy to read (non-cerebral and flake-friendly), just made life suck less. And, by the time I was finished reading the series, the PPD had vanished, and I was not in pain any more and life was an enjoyable existence.
So, out of deference to the author, Stephenie Meyer, I committed to watching the movies -- because I was so helped by her story that I felt honor-bound to watch the movies. I wasn't surprised to see Kristen Stewart in the line-up. Her looks were and are a dead ringer to Bella. Robert Pattinson is NOT a comfortable match for Edward, but, as I was not consulted, whatever. I loved Shark Boy as Jacob and I thought that the actor chosen to play Charlie was as perfect a match as could be found. Twilight, in short, sucked. Sorry Twi-rabid-fans, but the movie sucked butt. Why does Edward's character skittle up trees like a spider monkey??? Why couldn't they simply do the "forest of Endor" bit, like they did in Star Wars VI twenty years ago? I mean, he RUNS fast. There isn't anything remotely hinting at climbing trees with the finger-nails. Its not only ridiculous, and silly, but it does NOT translate well onto the big screen. I laughed my @ss off in the theatre watching those scenes (pissing off every tween within earshot). And what's with Edward's perpetual constipation??? I wouldn't think a purely liquid diet would wreek that kind of havoc on the digestive tract. But there he is, scene after painfully constricted scene, looking like he needs a pessary.
It was with deep chagrin that I purchased the New Moon movie. I didn't go see it at the theatre. I would have preferred to see it at the theatre, but I just never found the time. So, I LOVED LOVED LOVED Taylor Lautner. Shark boy did good. He is gorgeous and my oh my has he grown into one impeccable specimen. Holy Shit Batman, that boy is beautiful. Of course, at my middle-age, I feel like a pedophile. Perhaps this is what Hugh Hefner feels like. But, I digress.
Edward still seemed (though we see less of him) constipated. Kristen Stewart IS NOT a good match for Bella, she brings a pissy quality to the character that wasn't needed or wanted. I end up wanting to smack her. The phasing scenes were awesome, and I was seriously worried here because of the misstep of the "skittling up the trees" bit from the first flick. Still, there were significant pieces that were,...silly. But, it was better than the first. Hopefully, but the next movie, these actors will settle into the characters more, and stop trying to put their personal spin on it. The characters were well written and fully developed on their own. So, its been a bit tough watching Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson playing basically themselves with undertones of the characters. If you've seen Speak, with Kristen Stewart, than you've seen her portrayal of Bella. If you've seen Robert in ANYTHING since Harry Potter IV, then you've seen him portray his version of Edward. This is why avid book readers go ballistic when their passion comes to life on the silver screen: an actor, suffering from a self-aggrandizing ego who sees a new spin for the character. It isn't just about adding things that are unnecessary, or removing pivotal plot points; its about telling the tale of the characters. This requires that the character be portrayed as written. Sure, take artistic license and change up the look a LITTLE. Or maybe, the dialog needs to be altered here or there. But to change the essence of the character, well, that changes how that character would respond, react. And that makes the story get choppy and disjointed. It stops making sense. The cohesiveness is broken and you can't just shove the broken bits together to make the movie. That's why it feels like most of Twilight got left on the editing room floor. New Moon has the same dilemma, although not as bad.
I hope that Eclipse and Breaking Dawn are better. Even if they are not, I will still go see the movies, and watch the actors try to breathe life into the characters; my friends who walked me through a dark spot in my life, and helped me see the sunshine again.
28 March 2010
Not all movies are good;
...but sometimes, there's enough worthwhile parts to make a bad movie worth seeing.
I've seen some really SH!TTY movies in my day. But usually, even in a truly terrible movie, there is some redeeming quality that makes the whole suckfest palatable. Honestly, there have been a few that were so terrible, that nothing could redeem them (reminiscing I can recall Angel Eyes and Dungeons and Dragons). There are also those silent surprises, the ones where I had no idea the movie existed, but found myself at the theatre at odd times with few choices, and happened to see a fantastic movie I would not have seen otherwise. On that list (and deserving of reference OUTSIDE parenthesis) are: Spirited Away, Love Actually (uber-chick flick, but still great) and Eternal Sunshine (has a much longer title, but I can't remember the whole thing -- Jim Carrey).
I will admit, that I read the Twilight series and fell in love. In my defense, I am NOT one of those rabid Twi-Moms. What happened was this, I had just had a baby via c-section, it was pretty traumatic (surgery sucks) and the day I arrived home from the hospital, I found myself alone with a newborn, a toddler and a six-inch smiley-face incision. None of the people I had arranged to help were able to help which left me totally fucked and completely alone. I got pretty depressed, with Post-Partum Depression. I was told to "suck it up, because the family needs you right now." This baby was number 8, and so I had a lot on my plate, yet couldn't really move without mind-searing pain and I couldn't take the pain meds because I had to be alert enough to take care of the babies. A friend loaned me the series, and I sat on my shrinking ass, nursed my baby, and read, read, read. Diving into a good series, a simple series that was easy to read (non-cerebral and flake-friendly), just made life suck less. And, by the time I was finished reading the series, the PPD had vanished, and I was not in pain any more and life was an enjoyable existence.
So, out of deference to the author, Stephenie Meyer, I committed to watching the movies -- because I was so helped by her story that I felt honor-bound to watch the movies. I wasn't surprised to see Kristen Stewart in the line-up. Her looks were and are a dead ringer to Bella. Robert Pattinson is NOT a comfortable match for Edward, but, as I was not consulted, whatever. I loved Shark Boy as Jacob and I thought that the actor chosen to play Charlie was as perfect a match as could be found. Twilight, in short, sucked. Sorry Twi-rabid-fans, but the movie sucked butt. Why does Edward's character skittle up trees like a spider monkey??? Why couldn't they simply do the "forest of Endor" bit, like they did in Star Wars VI twenty years ago? I mean, he RUNS fast. There isn't anything remotely hinting at climbing trees with the finger-nails. Its not only ridiculous, and silly, but it does NOT translate well onto the big screen. I laughed my @ss off in the theatre watching those scenes (pissing off every tween within earshot). And what's with Edward's perpetual constipation??? I wouldn't think a purely liquid diet would wreek that kind of havoc on the digestive tract. But there he is, scene after painfully constricted scene, looking like he needs a pessary.
It was with deep chagrin that I purchased the New Moon movie. I didn't go see it at the theatre. I would have preferred to see it at the theatre, but I just never found the time. So, I LOVED LOVED LOVED Taylor Lautner. Shark boy did good. He is gorgeous and my oh my has he grown into one impeccable specimen. Holy Shit Batman, that boy is beautiful. Of course, at my middle-age, I feel like a pedophile. Perhaps this is what Hugh Hefner feels like. But, I digress.
Edward still seemed (though we see less of him) constipated. Kristen Stewart IS NOT a good match for Bella, she brings a pissy quality to the character that wasn't needed or wanted. I end up wanting to smack her. The phasing scenes were awesome, and I was seriously worried here because of the misstep of the "skittling up the trees" bit from the first flick. Still, there were significant pieces that were,...silly. But, it was better than the first. Hopefully, but the next movie, these actors will settle into the characters more, and stop trying to put their personal spin on it. The characters were well written and fully developed on their own. So, its been a bit tough watching Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson playing basically themselves with undertones of the characters. If you've seen Speak, with Kristen Stewart, than you've seen her portrayal of Bella. If you've seen Robert in ANYTHING since Harry Potter IV, then you've seen him portray his version of Edward. This is why avid book readers go ballistic when their passion comes to life on the silver screen: an actor, suffering from a self-aggrandizing ego who sees a new spin for the character. It isn't just about adding things that are unnecessary, or removing pivotal plot points; its about telling the tale of the characters. This requires that the character be portrayed as written. Sure, take artistic license and change up the look a LITTLE. Or maybe, the dialog needs to be altered here or there. But to change the essence of the character, well, that changes how that character would respond, react. And that makes the story get choppy and disjointed. It stops making sense. The cohesiveness is broken and you can't just shove the broken bits together to make the movie. That's why it feels like most of Twilight got left on the editing room floor. New Moon has the same dilemma, although not as bad.
I hope that Eclipse and Breaking Dawn are better. Even if they are not, I will still go see the movies, and watch the actors try to breathe life into the characters; my friends who walked me through a dark spot in my life, and helped me see the sunshine again.
EP STORY The Language Barrier
I Think Men and Women Are Different
23 February 2010
I've noticed a difference between women and men in the way they have respond to events in other people's lives. On the topic of divorce, I hate to admit it but, it is divided right down the sex. The women, while sympathetic, steer clear of the divorcing woman like she has a disease and they're afraid she's contagious. The men, instinctively recognizing the vulnerability, while acknowledging the weaknesses of their "buddy", are VERY supportive and willing to help with the things they THINK he was doing. Overtly, they mean mowing my lawn, fixing the drywall in the laundryroom, working on her car. Subtly, I think they are willing to offer a bit more help and secretly hoping that some of the stories in Penthouse Forum are actually true. When you get right down to it, when they hear, "Husband likes younger girls, we're getting a divorce," the women hear, "you could be next;" while the men hear, "YOU could be next......" Ok, so its the same words, but the meaning is so very different.
For those of you, still married, happily or otherwise, you have to start out knowing you speak different languages. And, I don't mean the trite, "mars and venus" crap. We read those books too, and it really didn't help US communicate with EACH OTHER. We could figure out what was wrong, but not how to fix it. If you want to keep things working, you have to move to that next step. Ok, so there IS a language barrier, now move to the next step and try to reach across the chasm and understand each other. If your partner misunderstood you, then you failed to clearly express yourself. YOU have to ensure they understand on THEIR end what you truly mean. In a communication skills workshop I attended, the moderator said this: the responsibility in any disagreement rests with the one who is bugged by the event. That means that if your partner pisses you off, the responsibility to initiate the discussion is YOU because the issue lies with YOU. You can't expect your partner to know all the instances where he or she pissed you off, nor are they responsible to correct those events without your involvement. I bring this up because of the number of times that I've heard this phrase from one of my friends: he should know that I'm upset. Um, no, he shouldn't. Unless he's clairvoyant.
Men have "wants," Women have "feelings." Men WANT to feel basically one thing,...orgasm. Other than that, I'm sure they want to feel wanted, loved, appreciated. But, correct me if I'm wrong guys, men would take sex over their "feelings" any day, every day. Obviously not to be treated like scum, cause I've seen that too. But I'm talking generalities here. Women, want to FEEL. Here is a quick list of the things women want to feel, and they are NOT in order, or preference or indicative of anything else: loved, cherished, worshipped, appreciated, needed, supported, sexy, feminine, strong, romantic, intelligent, vibrant, essential, modern, classic, did I say "sexy" yet? ...and they'd REALLY, REALLY, REALLY like to feel orgasms at least as often as their mates do. But you have this language thing, getting in the way. A woman can be set upon making love to a man, and all he has to do to screw it all up is talk.
My best friend says this little snippet all the time. She says, women hear more than just the words. So when a man says, "I don't know what you like" the woman hears, "I don't know you." And, by that she hears, "I don't LOVE you." So you can imagine his confusion when all he WANTS is to know what she wants to eat for dinner, and she bursts out in tears lamenting, "you don't love me." Men want you to tell them, and they want you to say it in a way that does not demean them or imply that they are stupid. Men are not stupid, but they do not take leaps of logic. All he really wants is to enjoy a meal with you, that you enjoy, and his tastes are varied so he's amenable to letting you pick out what you'd like to eat. But, at the same time, he can say things that sound so heartless and shallow, and he means nothing by it. It hasn't occured to him what you might infer (however correctly) from the sometimes thoughtless things he says. And, women take HUGE leaps of logic, sometimes to their peril. But, no one will read you and know you, between the lines and between the sheets quite like a woman who CAN take giant leaps in logic. A woman that can pull together seemingly unrelated bits of data is both exciting and surprisingly intuitive, and annoying and frustrating.
If we take a minute, to ensure that the message gets across, however which way it must go, maybe we can start communicating and moving on to step two, UNDERSTANDING. Wouldn't it be great?
23 February 2010
I've noticed a difference between women and men in the way they have respond to events in other people's lives. On the topic of divorce, I hate to admit it but, it is divided right down the sex. The women, while sympathetic, steer clear of the divorcing woman like she has a disease and they're afraid she's contagious. The men, instinctively recognizing the vulnerability, while acknowledging the weaknesses of their "buddy", are VERY supportive and willing to help with the things they THINK he was doing. Overtly, they mean mowing my lawn, fixing the drywall in the laundryroom, working on her car. Subtly, I think they are willing to offer a bit more help and secretly hoping that some of the stories in Penthouse Forum are actually true. When you get right down to it, when they hear, "Husband likes younger girls, we're getting a divorce," the women hear, "you could be next;" while the men hear, "YOU could be next......" Ok, so its the same words, but the meaning is so very different.
For those of you, still married, happily or otherwise, you have to start out knowing you speak different languages. And, I don't mean the trite, "mars and venus" crap. We read those books too, and it really didn't help US communicate with EACH OTHER. We could figure out what was wrong, but not how to fix it. If you want to keep things working, you have to move to that next step. Ok, so there IS a language barrier, now move to the next step and try to reach across the chasm and understand each other. If your partner misunderstood you, then you failed to clearly express yourself. YOU have to ensure they understand on THEIR end what you truly mean. In a communication skills workshop I attended, the moderator said this: the responsibility in any disagreement rests with the one who is bugged by the event. That means that if your partner pisses you off, the responsibility to initiate the discussion is YOU because the issue lies with YOU. You can't expect your partner to know all the instances where he or she pissed you off, nor are they responsible to correct those events without your involvement. I bring this up because of the number of times that I've heard this phrase from one of my friends: he should know that I'm upset. Um, no, he shouldn't. Unless he's clairvoyant.
Men have "wants," Women have "feelings." Men WANT to feel basically one thing,...orgasm. Other than that, I'm sure they want to feel wanted, loved, appreciated. But, correct me if I'm wrong guys, men would take sex over their "feelings" any day, every day. Obviously not to be treated like scum, cause I've seen that too. But I'm talking generalities here. Women, want to FEEL. Here is a quick list of the things women want to feel, and they are NOT in order, or preference or indicative of anything else: loved, cherished, worshipped, appreciated, needed, supported, sexy, feminine, strong, romantic, intelligent, vibrant, essential, modern, classic, did I say "sexy" yet? ...and they'd REALLY, REALLY, REALLY like to feel orgasms at least as often as their mates do. But you have this language thing, getting in the way. A woman can be set upon making love to a man, and all he has to do to screw it all up is talk.
My best friend says this little snippet all the time. She says, women hear more than just the words. So when a man says, "I don't know what you like" the woman hears, "I don't know you." And, by that she hears, "I don't LOVE you." So you can imagine his confusion when all he WANTS is to know what she wants to eat for dinner, and she bursts out in tears lamenting, "you don't love me." Men want you to tell them, and they want you to say it in a way that does not demean them or imply that they are stupid. Men are not stupid, but they do not take leaps of logic. All he really wants is to enjoy a meal with you, that you enjoy, and his tastes are varied so he's amenable to letting you pick out what you'd like to eat. But, at the same time, he can say things that sound so heartless and shallow, and he means nothing by it. It hasn't occured to him what you might infer (however correctly) from the sometimes thoughtless things he says. And, women take HUGE leaps of logic, sometimes to their peril. But, no one will read you and know you, between the lines and between the sheets quite like a woman who CAN take giant leaps in logic. A woman that can pull together seemingly unrelated bits of data is both exciting and surprisingly intuitive, and annoying and frustrating.
If we take a minute, to ensure that the message gets across, however which way it must go, maybe we can start communicating and moving on to step two, UNDERSTANDING. Wouldn't it be great?
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Taking A Break
I'm so tired of transferring my data from Experience Project to here!!! OMG, what a project. And, I haven't even begun working on my stories!! Holy crap batman!!! AND, there are fifty stories and posts I need to weed through. Didn't think I had that much to bitch about!!!
As time goes on, and I have to deal with the day to day backblast from those taht do read this new blog; I wonder, why am I doing this? While I love blogging, and really letting loose and just speaking my mind; it was said to me, by one of my many 'judged' that no one can speak their mind without facing repercussions. Why is that? Shouldn't people be able to speak their mind, and not have eight hundred hungry hippos ready to snap off their appendages???
Here's an open invitation to you, the reader: speak your mind. Make comments in my blog, even about shit that isn't related to the posting. Speak your mind. Let it all go. Just say whatever the hell comes to mind. I won't judge you. Freedom of speech is inalienable. So, speak. The asshats of the world can do their bullshit dance. Well, fuck them. Life is too fucking short. I've always fallen short of the mark in their eyes. May as well go down fighting.
Favorite quote from a movie, ever!!! "Its better to burn out than fade away."
As time goes on, and I have to deal with the day to day backblast from those taht do read this new blog; I wonder, why am I doing this? While I love blogging, and really letting loose and just speaking my mind; it was said to me, by one of my many 'judged' that no one can speak their mind without facing repercussions. Why is that? Shouldn't people be able to speak their mind, and not have eight hundred hungry hippos ready to snap off their appendages???
Here's an open invitation to you, the reader: speak your mind. Make comments in my blog, even about shit that isn't related to the posting. Speak your mind. Let it all go. Just say whatever the hell comes to mind. I won't judge you. Freedom of speech is inalienable. So, speak. The asshats of the world can do their bullshit dance. Well, fuck them. Life is too fucking short. I've always fallen short of the mark in their eyes. May as well go down fighting.
Favorite quote from a movie, ever!!! "Its better to burn out than fade away."
Experience Project 19
I'm Like Michael Jordan
13 July 2010
I've said it before, a few times. But now, I have decided that there really isn't any choice left. You all might know that certain individuals I would prefer NOT read my shit, have and do. And, I get to hear about it IRL. It sucks ass. You know? Instead of being my private domain, where I can just let go and be the real, pissed off me inside; its now a source of material to have thrown in my face everytime an argument breaks out. It's such a total load of crap too. And yet, so fucking sick of the bullshit and the bitching. BBBLLLEEEECCCCHHHHHH!!!
Screw it all, I'm taking my ball and I'm going home. Seriously, I am leaving EP and gonna build a new profile elsewhere. I think every one deserves to have that anonymous place to vent their thoughts and their frustrations without the bullshit repercussions from people who don't recognize what the term 'personal space' is. Everyone deserves that space to just be open and let all their giggly bits hang free; without being judged. And you know what? Those fucking narfbag asshats who pry into your personal space are really just saying this: "I don't respect you, I don't respect your mind, I don't respect your feelings, I don't respect your privacy and I DON'T RESPECT YOUR HUMANITY."
Yes, you might be thinking that, if someone in my real life is able to read my stuff here, then they are going to read this. YES, they ARE. IRL, I have said how upset I am. I have said how violated I felt. I have said the things I ought to have said. But I said those things in my "me" voice. The people in my life know me as a god-damned door mat. I have been a door mat most of my life. The reason people in my 'real life' are prying into my shit, is because suddenly (not suddenly to me, only to them), I am behaving differently than before. Yes, dear friends, ANGRYFACE has grown a back-bone. And because of all of you, awesome people, I'm learning that I can say whatever the fuck I want. I have every right to feel and think as I do. And the people in my life who aren't comfortable with the REAL me, really only ever wanted a doormat. Well, they can find a door mat ANYWHERE. I don't have to sign up for that gig anymore. I don't have to bend over and take the pole with no lube. I can face you or anyone else, flip the double bird and say "Go Fuck Yourself" with a big-ass smile on my face.
Still, I am leaving EP. Just so you know, this IS the best social networking site on the web. It is. But, some of these people in my life, they don't care about what I need, or what fulfillment I get out of being here. They only care about their self, and how they might appear, however unnamed and unknown, to my circle. I wanted this site so I could express things I didn't want to share with these people. Because they judge me, they find me lacking and short-of-the-mark. Because they find fault with me. Because they compare me to others and I end up last, or less. Because they don't know me. Because they don't want to know me. I am sad to go, but, you can all still read about my angry bitching pathos on my blog at blogspot. I'm not sure how you find me, exactly, except to say that my blog is here
http://angryface1970.blogspot.com
For my circle, kids, you guys are awesome. I will contact you separately and let you know where I'm headed. You guys have been the best. The truth will set you free. ANGRYFACE
13 July 2010
I've said it before, a few times. But now, I have decided that there really isn't any choice left. You all might know that certain individuals I would prefer NOT read my shit, have and do. And, I get to hear about it IRL. It sucks ass. You know? Instead of being my private domain, where I can just let go and be the real, pissed off me inside; its now a source of material to have thrown in my face everytime an argument breaks out. It's such a total load of crap too. And yet, so fucking sick of the bullshit and the bitching. BBBLLLEEEECCCCHHHHHH!!!
Screw it all, I'm taking my ball and I'm going home. Seriously, I am leaving EP and gonna build a new profile elsewhere. I think every one deserves to have that anonymous place to vent their thoughts and their frustrations without the bullshit repercussions from people who don't recognize what the term 'personal space' is. Everyone deserves that space to just be open and let all their giggly bits hang free; without being judged. And you know what? Those fucking narfbag asshats who pry into your personal space are really just saying this: "I don't respect you, I don't respect your mind, I don't respect your feelings, I don't respect your privacy and I DON'T RESPECT YOUR HUMANITY."
Yes, you might be thinking that, if someone in my real life is able to read my stuff here, then they are going to read this. YES, they ARE. IRL, I have said how upset I am. I have said how violated I felt. I have said the things I ought to have said. But I said those things in my "me" voice. The people in my life know me as a god-damned door mat. I have been a door mat most of my life. The reason people in my 'real life' are prying into my shit, is because suddenly (not suddenly to me, only to them), I am behaving differently than before. Yes, dear friends, ANGRYFACE has grown a back-bone. And because of all of you, awesome people, I'm learning that I can say whatever the fuck I want. I have every right to feel and think as I do. And the people in my life who aren't comfortable with the REAL me, really only ever wanted a doormat. Well, they can find a door mat ANYWHERE. I don't have to sign up for that gig anymore. I don't have to bend over and take the pole with no lube. I can face you or anyone else, flip the double bird and say "Go Fuck Yourself" with a big-ass smile on my face.
Still, I am leaving EP. Just so you know, this IS the best social networking site on the web. It is. But, some of these people in my life, they don't care about what I need, or what fulfillment I get out of being here. They only care about their self, and how they might appear, however unnamed and unknown, to my circle. I wanted this site so I could express things I didn't want to share with these people. Because they judge me, they find me lacking and short-of-the-mark. Because they find fault with me. Because they compare me to others and I end up last, or less. Because they don't know me. Because they don't want to know me. I am sad to go, but, you can all still read about my angry bitching pathos on my blog at blogspot. I'm not sure how you find me, exactly, except to say that my blog is here
http://angryface1970.blogspot.com
For my circle, kids, you guys are awesome. I will contact you separately and let you know where I'm headed. You guys have been the best. The truth will set you free. ANGRYFACE
Experience Project 18
I'm An Asshat
7 July 2010
Ok, so sometimes my anger backfires. Sometimes, the reason I stand alone is because I've pushed everyone away. It's amazing to me that several months later, I have ANYONE in my circle at all. Of course, NOW, because of my rapid fire mouth and stunning reparte, my circle just got smaller. All I can say is this: if you think I'm ever going to be perfect, you're sadly looking to the wrong chicadee. I am NOT perfect and am never going to be perfect. Sometimes, I shoot of my mouth in the worst possible way. I am sorry to my dear friend that I verbally assaulted out of anger and misunderstanding. And yet, if you don't want to be in my circle, I get it. I'm a bit much to deal with, temper and such aside. However, we all come here as less than perfect people and I try to be understanding and accepting. Just hope that you can do the same.
One thing I have always been proud of, about myself, is my ability to recognize that I've been wrong and to apologize. I do make mistakes and try to be open about it, try to account for my bad behavior and correct it. Still, sometimes you can't wallow any more in your own mistakes, you have to move on, grow and move on. And, the people that you've hurt, well, they need to move on as well. People have hurt me before and it sucks. But I too had to forgive them and move on--even if only for myself to move on.
And in the midst of all the chaos, having pissed off a friend, and feeling like I can't get anything right, I have to be thankful for at least one thing: I didn't break anything this time!
7 July 2010
Ok, so sometimes my anger backfires. Sometimes, the reason I stand alone is because I've pushed everyone away. It's amazing to me that several months later, I have ANYONE in my circle at all. Of course, NOW, because of my rapid fire mouth and stunning reparte, my circle just got smaller. All I can say is this: if you think I'm ever going to be perfect, you're sadly looking to the wrong chicadee. I am NOT perfect and am never going to be perfect. Sometimes, I shoot of my mouth in the worst possible way. I am sorry to my dear friend that I verbally assaulted out of anger and misunderstanding. And yet, if you don't want to be in my circle, I get it. I'm a bit much to deal with, temper and such aside. However, we all come here as less than perfect people and I try to be understanding and accepting. Just hope that you can do the same.
One thing I have always been proud of, about myself, is my ability to recognize that I've been wrong and to apologize. I do make mistakes and try to be open about it, try to account for my bad behavior and correct it. Still, sometimes you can't wallow any more in your own mistakes, you have to move on, grow and move on. And, the people that you've hurt, well, they need to move on as well. People have hurt me before and it sucks. But I too had to forgive them and move on--even if only for myself to move on.
And in the midst of all the chaos, having pissed off a friend, and feeling like I can't get anything right, I have to be thankful for at least one thing: I didn't break anything this time!
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