Experience Project 06

Dark Sunglasses
(with the mirrors on the inside)
11 June 2010
It has been brought to my attention that I view things, life through some jaded filters. You know how some people are so obnoxiously upbeat that they hear the "shiny-happy-people" song every step they take? Well, pick that Perky-Chick up and chuck her through the looking glass; then you get ME.

Jaded? Not even close. Jaded wakes up expecting things to go wrong. Jaded goes out into the world, expecting little from people. Jaded is a wussbag. Jaded lacks the courage of their convictions to step out on what they know. Jaded lacks the intestinal fortitude to be preemptive. Jaded is a bit of a pussy.

I've been forced to watch the entire series (note: series, not season, all of the seasons, back to back until I actually liked the show, which is a form of brain washing I feel) of NCIS. I'm with Ziva David:
1. If it annoys you, kill it
2. Attack first, ask questions later
3. Drive fast; it's the best way to avoid roadside bombs.

You want perky? Climb down out of my tree and go climb a willow, or some flowering bushy thing that can't bear weight. Go frolick through the tulips though they're only in season for about 3 weeks. Go cozy up to those sexy rose bushes, the thorns are lovely I'm told. The point is,.. I AM a fucking TREE. I've got deep roots, a deadly accurate moral compass, strong limbs that support which have been tested through storms and fire, and those leaves everywhere. And, I'm a tree,... I'm gray, sometimes drab. I weather the winters by dying slightly. But I'm right back in the spring, ready to grow again.

I do view things through some darkened glasses. No rosy tinting over here. But hell, why do I have to be judged about it? I haven't attended the party yet where I didn't have at least three quarters of the crowd laughing their asses off at my sarcastic observations. If Dennis Miller, Dennis Leary and Chris Rock were blended together and made into a woman,.. that woman would be my friend (not arrogant enough to claim to be THAT witty or smart). So, I have a few dark clouds that rain on only me. And the sun shines out of other chicks asses. Whatever.

On the dating front. This aspect does make me less attractive it seems. A guy I work with said, "well, guys just don't want to be dragged down all the time." Hmmm, yeah, I get that. That would suck. Seriously? I don't get that. Aren't there any jaded, pissed off dudes out there, that aren't total assholes? Of course,..they are all flocking to the impossibly cheerful, angelic little cherubs that twitter and giggle so sweet and demure with the right thing to say at every given moment..... ... ... ... ok, enough of that, I just vomited in my mouth alittle.

So,.. one does not want to venture into the dark unknown, alone. However, apparently, I will be comforted with my medium cache of weapons and knives, my stunning reparte and rapier wit, and perhaps a bottle of Scotch,...

Cheers.